alecto - your little bluejay (pollytrance) wrote,
alecto - your little bluejay
pollytrance

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Compulsive Obsessive Dilemma In Love

Hello Kids.

Well, I'm done with skool tomorrow, I can turn in my transcripts to the counseling office and then go dick around in LA until June when I have to walk in the graduation ceremony. No more credits for me, thanks. And Mr. Blunt says I can still visit my creative writing class whenever I want. Hooray. Mr. Greene gave me his email address but I still haven't written him. I still think I was deeply hurt by the fact that I loved him so much that I took his class for three years, and then when I became a senior he ditched out on me :(

So anyways, I'm about to head over to Lottie Ballou's with the goon and pick out his purple Willy Wonka suit because I guess it's official we're going to prom.

Sorry to Tyler, Cameron, Dustin, Chris and whoever else I said should come with me... I just wanted lots of dates. I don't think any of them really care or really thought I was serious anyway.

Oh! And the most exciting thing happened last night. I went to Chevron at like 5.30 in the morning and Mark was still working, and I said, "Do you have three pennies?" Because the total for the nachos and the drink is $2.03, and he handed me a cup and said, "Here, take this cup and fill it up, and let's pretend you already paid for the nachos."

Score! C-Y-T friend! That made me really happy, because it's the second time it's happened! Although I promised myself after the first time that it wouldn't happen again because I would feel guilty about getting free stuff.

I guess I would feel guilty asking for/expecting free stuff, but if he just randomly decides to give it to me, it's ok. Also, I'll never go in there without any money and be like, "Hmm, well I have no money. *bats eyelashes* Will you just keep a secret and let me take it?"

I will always have money with me, but I won't say no to charity. For every free nacho-drink thing I get there, it equals one bridge toll, plus three cents.

I feel like Helena Bonham Carter from Fight Club, stealing food and pretending to be poor and homeless. I bet that's how I'm really gonna turn out when I'm her age, but if I end up looking anything like her I will be happy.

But in order to really be like her, I'd have to be on meds again, and that's something I'd rather NOT do.

I hate it when my parents tell me to do things. It makes me want to eat shards of glass instead. As Gunnar says, "Give me a rule, and I wanna break it."

I wish I wasn't such a Taurus. We possess swine-heads. And are obsessive. But we live for those we love, so if I love you, and you know it, know that I live for you.

I'm out boys and girls. Have a nice evening.

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