alecto - your little bluejay (pollytrance) wrote,
alecto - your little bluejay

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So right after I posted Katz, Stefan was like, "Hey you" and I got scared. I've had his Doors CD's forever and I was scared that he was going to demand I find them and he was going to hate me. Instead he was like, "Let's hang out."

That was a very pleasant surprise and helped me make the most of what was to be, without him, a boring evening at home alone.

I think there are higher planetary forces at work here. I no longer have Zim... I don't know, something about tonight was just weird and unnatural. The things I think are starting to come true. Does that mean that my life has become drearily predictable (although I think not, because of outside forces which I cannot control), or, have I finally developed that special sense, that thing... ability to use more than three percent of my brain? Am I able to manifest the events that I want, or is it simply that I am in tune with the vibrations of others and I can sort of see what's going to happen in the future?

Tonight was just WAY too deja vu-ish for me. It was like I was replaying a scene that had already happened, or, no, like I was directing a movie and the actors were doing what I wanted. But not in a greedy way, just in the way that the production of the film was going smoothly for all, not just for me.

I don't know what has made me centered. Maybe it is the loss of hearing in my right ear, my sixth sense has taken the place of one of my missing senses and I have tuned in. I don't know. All I know is that it is beautiful. I am consumed with all kinds of beauty at the moment. I feel as though I am in the center of a very dark room and I can hear all the frequencies and see all the waves of light rushing past me and blowing my hair to one side. The noises are incredible. The dark room stretches on forever, but I am in the center. Not because everything is revolving around me, just because everything that is going on looks just like an open door. There are so many options that I just want to hold on to this beautiful experience forever.

So anyway, Stefan and I went to Toys 'R' Us in search of Zim merchandise and animatronic toys that we could play with. Then we went to his house and I loaned him my Powerpuff Girls tapes and he loves them, and he likes Space Ghost as much as I do, and his favourite character (boy alert) is Brak.

Mine is too close to decide but it is between Moltar and Zorak. They both have golden moments that couldn't possibly be pitted against one another.

Then we spent a lot of time online, for what purpose, I'm not sure. I think I was trying to show him something web-related. Talked to Lindsay and then Josh and Aaron came over and messed with cars and I was left alone in the house to wander about online and speak with Lindsay and Lauren.

I miss Lauren a lot, but am happy for her tonight, as she has found a classy man who has asked to take her to dinner.

Sometimes being singled out is a good thing, even if it's just by default.

The quickest way to end a miracle is to ask it why it is.

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